Lonely as Rain
by D-chan
Summary: An introspective look at the character that is Akito. Set shortly after the end of the series, possibly around the end of the first episode...


:: Lonely as Rain ::  
  
Fruits Basket  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, Akito, Hatori, Tohru, Yuki, Kyou or anyone else vaguely mentioned.  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Pairings: none really... hinted Akito+Yuki/Hatori, hinted possible Hatori+Tohru  
  
Warnings: creepiness, possible OOC-ness, language  
  
Notes: Okay, I want to say that 1) This is my first FB fic, so... Go me! ^^ And 2) There is some Tohru-bashing in here, but don't mistake it as how I feel; I love Tohru, I think she's fantastic and so ADORABLE and such, but this is from Akito's point-of-view, so it's going to be a bit... Harsh.  
  
Anyway, I wrote this at school, kind of on a whim. Hope you enjoy. I'd love some criticism if anyone can be bothered to dish it out, so please feel free to do so! Thank you. ^_^  
  
  
  
  
  
It had been a while since the last time I stopped everything just to listen to the sounds around me. Right now, outside the safety of my house, it is raining, a steady spatter of water like spraying blood from the wounded against the rooftop.  
  
Rain depresses me.  
  
I find myself with my back against the wall, the cool but rough boards pressing into my skin, headless of the fine silken material attempting to cover me. I am curled up like a small child, cheek resting on my knees as I peer out the window through my girlishly long lashes, my emotions desolate and unpleasant.  
  
My hand stretches out, caressing the sliding door. It is cold rain, as I can feel the outside temperature though the thin papered frames.  
  
Cold rain, loneliness, pain, suffering, darkness...  
  
With a sudden violent jerk, I slam my fist through the fragile door. Wind howls; stray drops of water fly through, splashing on my face, my feminine features...  
  
Like Yuki's...  
  
My chest constricts with sudden anger, fury. Yuki is no longer *here*. He's with that girl, that *bitch*. In another fit of anger, my fist smashes into the door, widening the hole. Hatori had warned me to stay inside, to stay out of the rain and cold, to keep me from getting sicker, but what's the *point*? I'm going to die anyway. I'm dying right now, growing progressively weaker with each passing moment of breath... AND I HATE IT!  
  
The Juunishi think they have it so hard, being cursed, never to be embraced by the opposite sex outside of their own kind, but none of *them* has to bear the curse in its entirety. That is why I have to make them suffer, be miserable. Pain, pain, *pain*, PAIN!  
  
"Yuki." The name passes my lips in a throaty hiss, filled with love and hate. Yuki is my precious one, my favourite toy, the one I want to break the most. He can neither live without nor forget me, which only makes it all the more delightful. Remembering me hurts him, but to forget me would kill him.  
  
Suffer, suffer, suffer...  
  
I realize a sting in my hand that must have been throbbing for minutes now; splinters. I bitterly watch the droplets of blood pool in my palm. A crimson lake, too shallow to drown in, filled with the epitome of Life, Love, Hate and Death all at once. Constant war, Life and Death always at battle, Love and Hate struggling to be the victor...  
  
I swing my bloodied hand beside me, grasping the nearest object -- a book, a diary of sorts. With a violent swing of my arm, I hurl it through the door, into the rain, viciously glad to be rid of the cursed object *that* girl had given to me.  
  
A soft, vaguely crazy smile touches my lips, which I know to be full and lovely as any female's. That girl: Honda Tohru. Tohru, Tohru, Tohru... An appropriately stupid name for an ugly and stupid girl.  
  
I hate her, hate her, HATE HER!  
  
As I sit here, bathing in bitterness, what is she doing? Happily making dinner for lovely Yuki, Kyou and Shigure, no doubt. So happy, always happy... Even *I* couldn't shatter that ridiculously bright smile. The very thought *burns* me, to the very core of my soul, spreading like a wildfire to my every limb, making my lungs choke as I breathe.  
  
When I am gone, *she* will be there, making them happy, making them smile. She will bright light to their cursed lives, and who will be left to make them suffer? No one! I'll be dead!  
  
"DEAD!" I shriek horribly. "Damn you to the depths of hell, Honda Tohru! DAMN YOU!"  
  
My screaming finally attracts attention. I hear the thud of feet in the hallway, then the slam of a sliding door as Hatori enters, a bit tousled but not the least out of breath.  
  
It *infuriates* me. I can barely walk the distance of the same hallway before becoming short of breath, whereas he *scrambles* (or perhaps that is too ungraceful a word for Hatori?) and arrives in perfect shape and health.  
  
I both love and hate him, too.  
  
He kneels before me, taking my hand and eyeing the blood. Not even a shake of his head does he dare, simply a single blink of his visible eye and then he stands, walking out to shortly return with disinfectant and bandages.  
  
I keep my head bowed as he works, his own expression devoid of emotion. It pleases me, for it was I that wiped the tenderness from his eyes so long ago as I had driven *that* woman to near insanity, making him give her up and erase her memory.  
  
"She's so stupid," I murmur softly, now referring to Tohru, whom I hate with all my entirety. To anyone else I may sound insane, but everything makes sense to me in my own mind. "Ugly stupid, weak, pathetic..."  
  
I watch for his reaction, infuriated at the hint of tension in his arms as he continues to tend to my immediate wounds and needs. Ever Hatori... Even Hatori! She wants to steal them all from me!  
  
"There," he finally says. "At least you're still alive." He stands, not daring to turn more than halfway away from me. "I'll see to someone fixing the door immediately."  
  
And then he's gone, leaving me to my rancorous, cold anger. Leaving me alone.  
  
Leaving me to die.  
  
Leaving me to weep salty tears as similar words from the one person I hate so much comes back to me.  
  
"You're alive right now, aren't you, Akito-san?"  
  
  
  
~ Owari ~ 


End file.
